Tell Them Who I Am

[usbornelynsey]

I just finished reading Tell Them Who I Am by Elliot Liebow. It is about the lives of homeless women, and it is an incredible book. If any of you are looking for a great book to read, I would highly recommend this book!

I checked it out from the library, but it is also available online and in bookstore. Here is one link to it.

http://www.amazon.com/Tell-Them-Who-Am-Homeless/dp/014024137X

Let me know if anyone has read this or what you think if you decide to read it.

[Audrey]

Lynsey,

I have not read the book. Can I share a story? Yes, I'm a story teller :)

Two years ago, my daughter participated in a program in Washington D.C. It was a volunteer, social action program. Part of the program was meeting with and having true conversations with homeless folks.

A few days ago, she and I were talking. We were talking about the homeless and she said "if I give a homeless person money, it's because I want to make their life better for a minute, an hour or a day. If they use that money for alcohol and that alcohol makes them happy, then I"ve done what I wanted to do".

She really had a valid point. I have a hard time giving my money to be used for alcohol, but she had a really valid point. I'm sure the book is very enlightening.

[MaryAnn]

Audrey - that reminds me of a story that I heard Wayne Dyer tell (paraphrased): he was driving his children to the movies. At a stop light he saw a homeless man with his dog, begging for money on the corner. He felt compelled by God to give him $5. His children made all kinds of remarks about the homeless man would just use the money to buy alcohol and Wayne shouldn't give it to him. Wayne said that giving the man the money was between him (Wayne) and God. What the man did with the money was between the homeless man and God.

[usbornelynsey]

Thank you Audrey and Mary Ann for your posts! This book is awesome, and like I said, I would recommend it to anyone. My husband and I deliver day old bagels to a couple of different shelters each week. It is a valuable experience for us as well as them. We also helped served dinner a couple of weeks ago.

Helping people is what lifts me up when I am down. How about you? I would love to know your experiences serving people, how it makes you feel, positives and negatives that you have encountered. Reading such posts will hopefully encourage others to lend a helping hand to those in need.

[Nani]

You've got me hooked, Linsey. Monday I'm going to the library to find the book "Tell Them Who I Am." I'll keep you posted if I can find it.

My husband and I watched "The Yarn Princess" last night--and it raised a lot of similar questions for us. We want very much to be aware of people in need around us and try to help. (The "service motto" of our business is a quote from the Bible--about other people's needs being more important than our own.) But sometimes I wonder just how is best to help. For instance, we have a neighbor who is a widow, very little income, and the yard and porch are buried under junk. My husband and I talk about helping her clean up. But is that really helping--or just trying to make her like us? Maybe she likes stuff laying around???

Nani

[usbornelynsey]

You've got me hooked, Linsey. Monday I'm going to the library to find the book "Tell Them Who I Am." I'll keep you posted if I can find it.

My husband and I watched "The Yarn Princess" last night--and it raised a lot of similar questions for us. We want very much to be aware of people in need around us and try to help. (The "service motto" of our business is a quote from the Bible--about other people's needs being more important than our own.) But sometimes I wonder just how is best to help. For instance, we have a neighbor who is a widow, very little income, and the yard and porch are buried under junk. My husband and I talk about helping her clean up. But is that really helping--or just trying to make her like us? Maybe she likes stuff laying around???

Nani

I have not seen The Yarn Princess. I just got on my library's website and requested it. I will let you know what I think :)

As for your neighbor, I am sure she would like help from time to time. I would start by just being friendly, maybe bringing her over some muffins or something that you made. Then offer to help or volunteer to lend her your husband if she ever needs anything moved or lifted. You may find that what she needs the most is someone to visit with from time to time.

I love my grandma. She lives three houses down and comes over to my house three days a week and we exercise together. Mostly, we just dance with my two kids and visit, but we call it exercise. It is fun for both of us, but I know it is the highlight of her day sometimes.

[Nani]

I just checked at the library for "Tell Them Who I Am" but they didn't have it. :( I have access to some other libraries, so I'll keep trying.

Now with summer coming, it should be easier to see more of the neighbors--like the lady I mentioned. You are right, Linsey,small steps are probably better.

We live in a very small rural town, and I love it here. But the suicide rate is incredible. In the past two or three years six people have taken their lives that were either friends of ours or lived within two blocks of us. About 75% of the town are on some kind of public assistance and have very little hope of ever finding work. Is this common among other rural towns? My husband and I have always had this dream of being able to get a manufacturing site going that would create multiple jobs for people here.

Audrey, it sounds like having real contact with homeless people has made your daughter do some serious thinking about how she wants to make life better from them. I'll bet you were proud of her!

Mary Ann, Wayne Dyer (should I know who he is??) makes a terrific point! I hear all the time about not giving money. But maybe the success of the gift is measured in the giving rather than in how the gift is used!

Nani

[usbornelynsey]

I have the movie The Yarn Princess checked out. I got it today, but haven't had a chance to pop it in.

I will post more after viewing the movie.

[Nani]

Can't wait to see what you think of "Yarn Princes," Lynsey. I finally ordered "Tell Them Who I Am" from amazon this morning because I couldn't find it in the libraries around here. Looking forward to reading it!

Nani

[usbornelynsey]

I watched the movie The Yarn Princess a couple of days ago and I am still thinking about it. It was a great, and also sad movie. I love my children with everything in me, but being a mom is hard work sometimes. This movie reminded me to appreciate everything I have. If any of you have not seen it, I would recommend this movie.

[Nani]

The book has arrived and I just got through the intro. Thanks for recommending it, Lynsey.

Have you ever helped somebody out and had things turn out badly? My husband and I took a chance on a teenager a couple years back. He had dropped out of school early, didn't have much home life, and we thought--we still do think--he had potential. He landed a job out of town and we helped him get a car and the insurance so he could get to work. He made one payment and disappeared. Last we saw him, he was high. Did we do the right thing or would he have been better off without what we did? I don't begrudge the money. It's just really disappointing that he didn't take the chance for a step up. In the intro of Tell Them Who I Am, the author says he's met a lot of folks on their way to becoming homeless, but almost none who are getting out of being that way. What do they need to get out of the hole?

Nani

[usbornelynsey]

I have had a few learning experiences, but none that I would consider bad experiences. My husband and I helped a young girl buy a car. Her car kept breaking down, making it difficult for her get to college and to her two jobs. The loan was meant to be a two year loan. It has now been about 4 years. She is not making steady payments, but does send us a $50 check out of the blue sometimes with a letter updating us on her life. (She lives out of town now). It is nice to hear from her when she does, and the money always comes just when we need it.

If I had the situation to do over, I would probably do it the same way.