In desperate need...

[tac2bz]

I'm new to this site. 2 days old to be exact. I found this after searching for hours online for employment based out of my home.
Let me back track a minute.A little over a year ago, I decided to become a stay at home mom. I can't stand that title, by the way. Most people you tell what your "job" is, look at you like you sit at home eating bon-bons in front of the television. I WISH! haha Anyway, in spite of loving my children and believing whole heartedly that I made the right decision, I am losing my mind!
I have held jobs in the past that required a lot of hours and challenged me constantly. I looked for positions I knew would require more effort from me. I went from going to dinner with big shots to spending my days changing diapers and arguing with a 2 year old who thinks she's 10! I used to wear heels and business suits and now "dressing up" is wearing jeans instead of gym clothes. I'm gaining weight. I'm not enjoying my children the way I should be...because that was the whole point of me staying home with them. My relationship with my husband is strained, our finances have become strained and my mental state is quickly becoming strained. :blah:
I am much too smart to sit around feeling sorry for myself. I need interaction with adults. I need a sense of accomplishment. I need to feel like I contribute financially to the household. I need some direction! HELP ME!

[hbixler03]

Wow, I think as a SAHM I have gone through this whole phase as well! I guess I would start with what are some of the things you like to do?

I was listening to the Dave Ramsey show and he was saying that the best home businesses for moms are the ones where they turn a hobby into an income. Right now I make my online income from doing blog design, and I know a lot of moms out there are becoming Virtual Assistants, selling homemade stuff on etsy.com and the like!

So again, my questions would be, what do you like to do or even what would you like to learn to do?

[mamaof2byz]

what excactly are you looking for? friendships? an opportunity to work from home? a moms group? then we will know how to suggest! :)

[tac2bz]

Well, I think the "answer" to all of my issues right now would be an income that I could earn from home. I'm good at everything I do (not to toot my own horn), but I guess I don't know where to start. I have experience in marketing, graphic design, etc. But I've also got experience in project management and operations in a manufacturing setting. I'd be good at owning my own business, but I can't afford to pay attention, much less the start up cost of a business. I have an office at home...but I have a scatter brain right now when it comes to figuring out what I want to be when I grow up! LOL I guess I would just like to start making money NOW, which would enable me to spread my wings a little. It would certainly ease a lot of tension around the house.
It would also be nice to gain friendships, of course. I'm a firm believer in the power of support.
Soooooo ~ am I beyond help?! LOL

[WorkAtHomeSpace]

Nope, you're not beyond help. :) I think the first thing you need to do is decide what you want. Do you want to do graphic design? Marketing? Start your own business? Choose something. While a lot of us would like to start making money now, it's not that straight forward, but eventually the money will come. If you build it, it will come...sort of true, but you have to work it.

[tac2bz]

I find it so hard to believe that you can't get on the internet and find a job and start making money the day you start...just like any other job. Like I said, I guess that's where I want to start and THEN I'll start building. It's so depressing to face the fact that you have to have money to make money. If there's any truth to that, I'm doomed! LOL

[tam2005]

Nope, you're not doomed at all. You CAN earn an income online.

It sounds like you definitely want to start your own business. But like others have said here...starting a business takes time and hard work. I know that's not what you need to hear right now. :?

There is also work at home jobs, such as...customer service, transcription, writing, etc...

That income would be faster, but that is also determined by what company you would choose and the experience required. There are a few companies that hire without experience.

But again, you need to decide what it is you REALLY would like to do. Look around the forum more and do some reading. Also, ask any questions you may have. :)

There's lots of great resources here on the boards.

[mamaof2byz]

You have to deciede what it is you want to do. I can already tell that you are in the right place to find help with whatever decision that you make! Just let us know what it is and we will help. You can count me as a friend...;)

[Audrey]

I find it so hard to believe that you can't get on the internet and find a job and start making money the day you start...just like any other job. Like I said, I guess that's where I want to start and THEN I'll start building. It's so depressing to face the fact that you have to have money to make money. If there's any truth to that, I'm doomed! LOL

There are several sites that list telecommute opportunities. A few of our members here have links in their signatures to sites they run that do list telecommute opportunities. (look at Tammy and Sophia's signatures)

One of the largest sites out there is wahm.com She lists new jobs daily. I have seen some graphic design jobs posted. I've also seen other programming jobs listed. Scan the last month of jobs on her site. Look at what companies are hiring for on a telecommute basis.

The vast majority of those who work from home own a business. It sounds like your goal is not a business but a telecommute position.

Invest the next few days checking the site I mentioned along with the sites you'll find in sig lines here of a few of our members.

[judilynn]

Sometimes it can be frustrating finding the right place for you online. You have to find the right fit.
I love working from home. I am working on creating my own business, and I love that. It is what I do and what I love, but right now it is just hard to make ends meet doing that.
So I write for others while I do it. It gives me experience, feedback and other things, like pays the bills, while I work on growing my business.
You may have to look around, but there are quite a few places that you can contract with while you are looking for your fit.

[shelleyk]

I'm new to this site. 2 days old to be exact. I found this after searching for hours online for employment based out of my home.
Let me back track a minute.A little over a year ago, I decided to become a stay at home mom. I can't stand that title, by the way. Most people you tell what your "job" is, look at you like you sit at home eating bon-bons in front of the television. I WISH! haha Anyway, in spite of loving my children and believing whole heartedly that I made the right decision, I am losing my mind!
I have held jobs in the past that required a lot of hours and challenged me constantly. I looked for positions I knew would require more effort from me. I went from going to dinner with big shots to spending my days changing diapers and arguing with a 2 year old who thinks she's 10! I used to wear heels and business suits and now "dressing up" is wearing jeans instead of gym clothes. I'm gaining weight. I'm not enjoying my children the way I should be...because that was the whole point of me staying home with them. My relationship with my husband is strained, our finances have become strained and my mental state is quickly becoming strained. :blah:
I am much too smart to sit around feeling sorry for myself. I need interaction with adults. I need a sense of accomplishment. I need to feel like I contribute financially to the household. I need some direction! HELP ME!

No time to spell check so sorry for that before you start reading my post:eek:

I prefer our SAHM title to be Domestic Goddess:) (DG) That seems to make people smile. Yes most people do not give praise where praise is needed when it comes to a Domestic Goddess position which in turn does strain a relationship. Although being a DG is absolutely the hardest postion in the world there is no paycheck to go along with the experience. I too found myself in your position many years ago. The difference for me was I thought I was looking for the income to make me happy (even though my DH is a successful dentist) I did not find out unitl I had worked from home and made a name for myself and earned great money it was not the money I was looking for - it was the recognition of belonging to something again and corresponding with adults is what I missed. Before I got involved in the network marketing industry I worked as a school teacher and then I worked as an accountant (major and minored in college) The rewards I got from helping others with their health and financially gave me what I was longing for. The money was secondary but the money also turned out to be a blessing because even though I never needed to really ask for permission when it came to spending money I always thought it was my obligation to talk to DH since he was the one working and earning the income. Now I am earning as well and the money I bring in goes towards our two beach vacations a year and any other extra things that my husband would see as a waste - he does not see the vacation as a waste.

What are you passionate about? I am sure you have heard that many times before. Have you ever worked in an mlm or network marketing company? It is something you can do on your own time. You can reach me anytime if you have questions. I am actually being featured in a 3rd book and the title of the chapter is Find A Mentor. When I can share the title of the book I will announce it here when published. ANyway,
GOOD LUCK to you and I hope I helped a little or a lot!;)
Shelley Kimberly
shelleyk @ raex dot come

[MicheleDB]

I'm new to this site. 2 days old to be exact. I found this after searching for hours online for employment based out of my home.
Let me back track a minute.A little over a year ago, I decided to become a stay at home mom. I can't stand that title, by the way. Most people you tell what your "job" is, look at you like you sit at home eating bon-bons in front of the television. I WISH! haha Anyway, in spite of loving my children and believing whole heartedly that I made the right decision, I am losing my mind!
I have held jobs in the past that required a lot of hours and challenged me constantly. I looked for positions I knew would require more effort from me. I went from going to dinner with big shots to spending my days changing diapers and arguing with a 2 year old who thinks she's 10! I used to wear heels and business suits and now "dressing up" is wearing jeans instead of gym clothes. I'm gaining weight. I'm not enjoying my children the way I should be...because that was the whole point of me staying home with them. My relationship with my husband is strained, our finances have become strained and my mental state is quickly becoming strained. :blah:
I am much too smart to sit around feeling sorry for myself. I need interaction with adults. I need a sense of accomplishment. I need to feel like I contribute financially to the household. I need some direction! HELP ME!

Do you like typing? You could perhaps offer transcription services. Won't give you the benefit of interacting etc. but will bring in an income at least. You could do it part-time and when you have enough cash flow look into something that really interests you. At least with this you start earning immediately. The only thing is to find companies who are now hiring.

[lawhorn2]

I think the beginning is always scary especially when you put yourself last as most moms’ always do, but remember that’s one of the many things that make us special in our own way. You will be fine, just take a deep breath and remember that you are important and you offer a lot to your family. Their is always someone who knows were you come from. My kids are older and I still have to remind myself that I'm no place that someone has not been and even though it seems really hard their is hope and brighter days to come. Strength is something we all look for and it’s their, the rest will come in time.

Kim

[dynamiccashflow]

Hello,

I think the hardest job in the world is being a mom, and the most important. I respect my Mom and Wife for what they do. Don't feel down on yourself for not providing financially in your house. I'm pretty sure that you will if you really want to. It’s only a matter of time, before you do.

That is why you are here, to network with people, and see how they can help. We all feel the way you feel sometimes, we all go through those emotional roller coasters. It's human nature.

Here is something that I really believe in, and helps me keep a positive attitude: "THE SECRET"

It’s out in a book or DVD, just visit: http://www.thesecret.tv/

Just wanted to share with you, what helps me keep a positive outlook in life.

I hope it helps!!

[kagome]

Yes, it is very difficult at first but just hold on. Persevere in what you're doing and you'll soon find that all you're hard work will be rewarded.

[nyeoman]

I totally understand your issues here. I used to be a stay home mom for 5 years. At the end of that experience, I had cracked up! My husband and ended up getting a divorce. (But I'm not saying that is all because of my staying home, it was mostly his fault!! LOL :rolleyes: ) Basically though, I did feel like I lost myself.

You definitely need to find a balance between work and home. That's why many people look to work from home so that they feel connected to the outside world and feel as though they are also contributing to the household financially.

It can be very difficult to get to a good place because you have moved from one end of the spectrum to another. But, take heart, there is hope.

I actually have a part time job and work from home.

See if there is something you can do part time where you get to leave and work with adults a few hours a day or a few days a week. Maybe leave the kids with a relative or daycare during that time.

Also, try to find work from home. But be careful, many opps are scams! I know that there is a work from home opporunity where you don't have to buy anything or invest any money. I represent an online social site called JobDrama.com and they are always looking for new members to their sales marketing team.

Feel free to go to www.jobdrama.com to sign up for free, create a profile then add your resume. Let them know you are interested in joining the sales team and see what happens. I know for a fact they won't ask any $ from you!

Good luck and I'm sure things will turn around soon.
:heart:
Nova
www.JobDrama.com

[BSanburg]

Good Luck to You....You would be great at starting your own business from home.

thanks

[whiteazalea]

Everyone want to give moral support to you here...tac2bz! We are offering foc counseling session. :) Sorry, just jocking here!

But only you yourself can help yourself. Even people give you 1001 ways to go out from your state now, you wont see anything except problem. Because you will judges your current situation based on your experience (that you found in negative state) and will results in negative outcomes. Because your message show that you are too depressed now! Just be relax...make your mind relax. You are too smart to let your mind go in autopilot and ruined your life... I would suggest you to do hypnosis on self relaxation. If you want, I can give me your email & i give you free mp3. Do it daily and you can think with clear mind.

After that, you need privacy to think what do you want. I make the same mistakes in the past because I did not know what I want and my life going in wrong direction. Because If you do not have any plan in your life, you will follow someone plan and its not really what you want. So, the biggest thing is to Know What You Want and focus! Follow the law of attraction (in earlier post, dynamicashflow did talk about the secret)... focus on what you want and do not focus on what you dont want.

First thing first....relax!

[dynamiccashflow]

I find it so hard to believe that you can't get on the internet and find a job and start making money the day you start...just like any other job. Like I said, I guess that's where I want to start and THEN I'll start building. It's so depressing to face the fact that you have to have money to make money. If there's any truth to that, I'm doomed! LOL

Hello tac2bz,

Hope you are doing better now,......Did you check out the "Secret"? If you haven't I can send you a free copy. I have an extra copy.

To be very aggressive in online marketing, yeah, ...you need to spend some money. But did you know that there are some free online tactics out there, that can lead people to your website and or business.

Free, stuff like, videos, articles, hubpages, craiglist, forums, solo-ads, myspace,...ect... I can go on and on.

I'm an online marketer, and I promote lots of programs. I was in your same shoes a year ago. But then I came a cross a great team, Global Cashflow Training.com

This is our team, headed by my good friend Franco. It is free to join. We pretty much give out the all WE know about online business' and marketing. Including the free tactic that you need to get your business going. We give you the honest truth here.

We have daily free webinars here Mon-Fri at 9pm EST.

Let me know if you want to check out this team. I can give you the free access code to enter the webinar. I don't want to posted here, cuz it's by personal invitation only.

Here is my e-mail dynamicflow1@gmail.com

You can call me also if you like.


Good Luck.....

[MaryAnn]

No time to spell check so sorry for that before you start reading my post:eek:

I prefer our SAHM title to be Domestic Goddess:) (DG) That seems to make people smile. Yes most people do not give praise where praise is needed when it comes to a Domestic Goddess position which in turn does strain a relationship. Although being a DG is absolutely the hardest postion in the world there is no paycheck to go along with the experience. I too found myself in your position many years ago. The difference for me was I thought I was looking for the income to make me happy (even though my DH is a successful dentist) I did not find out unitl I had worked from home and made a name for myself and earned great money it was not the money I was looking for - it was the recognition of belonging to something again and corresponding with adults is what I missed. Before I got involved in the network marketing industry I worked as a school teacher and then I worked as an accountant (major and minored in college) The rewards I got from helping others with their health and financially gave me what I was longing for. The money was secondary but the money also turned out to be a blessing because even though I never needed to really ask for permission when it came to spending money I always thought it was my obligation to talk to DH since he was the one working and earning the income. Now I am earning as well and the money I bring in goes towards our two beach vacations a year and any other extra things that my husband would see as a waste - he does not see the vacation as a waste.

What are you passionate about? I am sure you have heard that many times before. Have you ever worked in an mlm or network marketing company? It is something you can do on your own time. You can reach me anytime if you have questions. I am actually being featured in a 3rd book and the title of the chapter is Find A Mentor. When I can share the title of the book I will announce it here when published. ANyway,
GOOD LUCK to you and I hope I helped a little or a lot!;)
Shelley Kimberly
shelleyk @ raex dot come

Shelly, I think you hit the nail on the head for me "the recognition of belonging to something again." As much as I love being a Domestic Goddess, I miss the interaction with other professionals in my field; doing a job I love in a career field that was fulfilling. I think that is what a lot of us are looking for again.

[SOHOdesignprint.com]

Don't give up.

The project management idea sounds like a good one. I have seen people start out by posting on craigslist and building from there. That's something that needs to be done everywhere, but businesses are cutting back on staff but still need projects taken care of to keep things rolling.

I think you need to sit down, hammer out one specific idea and jump into it. Get everything figured out in advance: exact services offered, rates, business name etc then launch it.

You don't need much money to start a business. I started mine while working on a school computer and it sounds like you have more than that already with your office.

You'll want a very clean and simple website that tells people what you do. You can get a template online cheaply from somewhere like templatemonster.com and freelancers to modify it quite cheap from Scriptlance (http://www.scriptlance.com/?ref=adavenue) From then on leave a business card EVERYWHERE you go. I had a friend who had a consulting business who used to leave them on the subway and bus as though they fell out of someone's pocket. It cost him $.001 for each one, but they looked great and he got a great response until the transit rep called him one day asking him to stop :)

One good client can lead to a dozen more and you need to realistically expect to go four or five months without income from it while you build. But if you have a business and goal you are working on then you'll be motivated and your relationship will get better once you both know it'll get better.


Good luck,
Kira

[sunshinebabies]

Oh I can so relate to what you're saying. I have always worked full-time outside of the home, and felt truly disconnected from my children. This past year I struggled to re-define my identity as I became a SAHM! I was having a hard time talking to the other SAHM's I would meet at school or at the gym. I was having a hard time having these "domestic" conversations, and I needed to stimulated my brain! What worked for me what reading books, books and more books. Some authors I admire are Robin Sharma, Wayne Dyer, T. Harv Eckhert to name a few. Once I was able to look deep inside myself, things started to fall into my lap and it became clear what I needed to do!

Remember you have to put time into yourself before you can even try to be successful doing anything else!

I wish you the best of luck!

[Audrey]

Robin Sharma is great. I found Robin years ago through a recommendation of a friend.

[Lori]

You've started an excellent thread that we all can relate with.

I'm new to this site. 2 days old to be exact. I found this after searching for hours online for employment based out of my home.
Let me back track a minute.A little over a year ago, I decided to become a stay at home mom. I can't stand that title, by the way. Most people you tell what your "job" is, look at you like you sit at home eating bon-bons in front of the television. I WISH! haha Anyway, in spite of loving my children and believing whole heartedly that I made the right decision, I am losing my mind!
Finding work online usually requires that you are an independent contractor -- so in fact you really do often start your own business. You work for companies, but you really work for yourself -- pay your own taxes and don't get benefits the way you do in a brick and mortar world.

It can be disheartening during the initial search. I always recommend a subscription to www.elance.com (http://www.elance.com) as an excellent starting place.

But it sounds like you have your hands full with the kids too - and yet you crave that feeling of accomplishment that you had when you were working.

I strongly suggest starting out slowly. Don't take on anything that has a huge time commitment. As you learn to fit the work into your day, you'll know when you are ready to take more on.

I have held jobs in the past that required a lot of hours and challenged me constantly. I looked for positions I knew would require more effort from me. I went from going to dinner with big shots to spending my days changing diapers and arguing with a 2 year old who thinks she's 10! I used to wear heels and business suits and now "dressing up" is wearing jeans instead of gym clothes. I'm gaining weight. I'm not enjoying my children the way I should be...because that was the whole point of me staying home with them. My relationship with my husband is strained, our finances have become strained and my mental state is quickly becoming strained. :blah:
I am much too smart to sit around feeling sorry for myself. I need interaction with adults. I need a sense of accomplishment. I need to feel like I contribute financially to the household. I need some direction! HELP ME!
Here's the best advice I could give you (from experience!)... get up in the morning and right away shower and get dressed. Sometimes dress up beyond the jeans even! It's really easy to slide into days in your pj's and when I have days like those - I really don't accomplish much of anything!

Also -- set aside even small blocks of time - 15 minutes or so... just to enjoy the kids. We like to kid ourselves into thinking we do this all day long. We don't. 15 minutes can make a huge difference in how the next two hours go work wise. My kids are in and out of my office all day. I find as soon as they feel that I have focused on them, hear what they want to tell me - engage with them... they feel more satisfied and independent. But if they have to compete for my attention and never really feel like they get the quality time that means the world to them - they turn into crazy little people!

I hope some of those thoughts are helpful to you. Let us know how it's going!

Lori

[busybee]

well i think the first you can see from all this is that you're not alone... and on these forums you have plenty of support, even if you've only just joined!

I think at this point in time, starting an online business is not what you need. By the sounds of things the hard slog in getting it started is not what you're after. But as others have said, there are a number of sites to pick up some temp work that could get you the income as desired, so give them a go. If they don't give you the satisfaction you desire, then I have to say I agree with the other post (can't remember who by!) that stated it is more so the recognition and interaction than the income. If this is the case then look for what YOU can do to achieve this. Maybe it's working 1 day on the wknd somewhere while your husband can do the goddess duties?

Anyway, just my thoughts!

Amanda

[ericamom]

Hello,

I can relate to everything you said I know what its like to feel fustrated and look at your kids differently instead of the way you should as a mother. Well I started my home buisness recently and its a tuff thing to do especially when you don't have the right people to help guide you and the right sources to go to. But you know you are in the right place here these ladies are very helpful and supportive and they always have good advice. I am a young single mother of two and I go through alot of strain in my life. But what I find that helps me is I turn to God and keep my faith in him. Try listening to some nice christian music and just weigh out all your opptions. Make a list of all the time you have and want to invest in what ever you decide to do. But most importantly make sure its something you are going to like doing. And I am here if you ever need a shoulder to lean on.

May your life be filled with many blessings in the days to come.

:angel2:

[give2receive]

Hello,

Just thought I'd add my own take on all the wonderful advice you've already gotten.

Lori suggested adding structure to your day. I think that's huge! Setting aside blocks of time to spend with your children will help the day run more smoothly for you and for them. My own kids are 12 and 15 now so they can fly a bit more on their own, but when they were small, it was ALLLL about structure. When you do set aside that time, choose a specific activity that you all enjoy. In my experience, when kids feel truly connected with, they are more reasonable to deal with.

Also, what works for me is making a list of 'to dos'. I always try to include in my schedule something that will stimulate my mind (like researching a particular marketing strategy, or learning some new technology online that I didn't realize even existed!)

Above all though, take time to reconnect with YOU. I agree with the other posters when they say you just need to narrow down what it is you actually want to do with your online busines, but if you're not taking time to feed your spirit, you won't have the steam to achieve your goals.

For me, it's scheduling time to be creative (I'm an artist). It sounds like you might be resisting the choice you've made which sometimes makes everything seem 'black and white'...but maybe truly embracing all the positives about your decision everyday - you'll press on with that brilliant mind and make it work FOR you.

All the best!


www.give2receive2.com

[Audrey]

Me time is so very important and it's something we as women tend to give up too easily :(

[lottomom]

You definitely need to start taking some time for yourself, and get out of the house to feel better, less trapped. Tell your husband that your going to get a once a week job, or go to the gym, workout and relax, sit in the sauna. Thats what i would do if i could, but we live too far out in the words and my husband is lost if i leave the kids with him ;)